pretty lady: you need prada.

Yesterday we met the group of Australians from Queensland University of Technology, and were all rounded up for a campus tour by our CUC ambassadors. They showed us the grocery store on campus, the dining halls and took a group of about 35 Americans and Australians to the bank... we were the loudest group I have ever heard. Pretty sure that bank considered closing its doors after we left.

After that, the whole lot of us went to lunch together at the dining hall. Now, let me explain this dining hall situation. You get a little swipey card, load it up with money, and swipe for every item you purchase. There are items from 1RMB (Chinese unit of currency, also known as the yuan) to 6.50RMB for you ballers out there. Basically 1USD is almost 7RMB... so you can eat an entire lunch, and buy a drink, for about 1.50USD. Sound like a bargain? It is. Want to know why? It's no Earhart Dining Hall... it's barely tolerable. Now, I was all about trying everything and eating different things here... but this food is something else. The first night, I got some soup with lots of noodles. It appeared to be chicken, and tasted like chicken for the first few slurps. Then... suddenly it became fishy. I hung up my chopsticks right there. And we now affectionately call it "Chicken Fish Soup."

The lunch with the Aussies wasn't great either. Turns out the onions and peppers I got also were laced with chunks of fat. No kidding. Chicken it was not. Thus, another failed attempt at feeding myself.

I have, however, been keeping myself hydrated to the maximum (which is good, because later in this blog post I will become very sick). Water, Minute Maid OJ, Gatorade... the bevs are pretty much the same as the US. They are all a tiny bit different, but at least they are familiar.

After our campus tour and lunch, we all headed out to the infamous underground Silk Market. To the left you will see me as a hot mess on the Subway. No a/c on most trains + thick smoggy hot air + one billion people = sweaty sweaty sweaty. Surprisingly though, it really didn't smell. Interesting.

So the Silk Market is this mall with tons and tons of stalls of fake designer goods. You walk through the aisles and all of the vendors yell to you, pull your toward their booths, and generally harass you to buy their wares.

They yell all sorts of things to you as you drift through a maze of fake Coach and Fendi. "Girl in skirt, buy my shoes!" "Pretty lady, you need Prada!" "Girl, Girl, buy more bags, buy more bags!"

If you are not ready for it, they will take you under so fast. Once you decide what you'd like to buy, you have to haggle them. They use calculators to show you the price and put on a whole song and dance as to why you are getting the best deal of the century. If you even try to walk away, they chase you. It's an art really.

This being said, most of us white Americans got taken for a ride and paid too much for what we bought. We are ready, though. We will strike again. And we will be prepared.

Aching for something familiar, we headed to WalMart. Yes, I know. I committed international sin and went to WalMart. But honestly, I needed some peanut butter. If I'm not eating Chicken Fish Soup, I'll need my protein somehow.

WalMart was remarkably familiar, aside from the fact that everything was in Mandarin. And I do give the people of Beijing credit for not using plastic bags. Apparently they are on their way to being outlawed, forcing everyone to use reusable ones.

After a long day, I took my Tide, Skippy, Ritz Crackers, Listerine and bottle of Great Wall wine back home. At this point I am getting hungry, so I dive into my PB. Meanwhile, it was the general consensus of the group... and we were quite forceful in our declaration... that we were NOT, under any circumstances, eating in the hot dining hall shoebox. We were going to Pizza Hut.

Here, Pizza Hut is fine dining, seriously. There were granite staircases and real plates. (Just think Katie McQ... a classy, classy hut.) But on the train on the way there, I started to feel quite faint. Not sure if it was the long day, the unbalanced diet or just me still adjusting to things here. Everyone else is fine. I am the weakest link. I suffer through a small piece of cheese pizza (thinking food would be a good idea)... and cursed myself for not feeling well because it was DELICIOUS. Just like America.

Came home, a walking pile of death and illness. Take two Tylenol PM and crawl into bed. I for sure have a fever as I sweated through the night... chills... aches... throat swelling shut. Miserable. Not to mention our beds are like cinder blocks (as a fellow student said). Right now I am sweating my life away, drinking mass quantities of Gatorade and water... blogging because I couldn't go back to sleep on account of my weakened condition.

In a minute I'll try to eat a spoonful of PB, was it down with Advil and go take a shower in someone else's room who was bestowed with the glory of hot water. (Oh yeah, our shower only functions as a cold shower. Others have heat, we do not. We are told there is not a chance in the world this will get fixed. Say hello to icy cold mornings for 7 weeks.)

So even though I am not feeling well AT ALL. I must persevere. I will put on a hooded sweatshirt and sweat through the day, hoping to break this fever. I will put on my giant sunglasses and be invisible, thus not allowing people to question why I look so tragic. Ugh. A sick American in China.